Holiday Blues

Naturally most get really amped around this time of year. Have you thought of those who may have lost loved ones? Those who may not be close to their families? Even those who are new to your city, church, job may not have a place to go. I've been blessed with amazing grandparents and family whom we've always spent holidays with. Can't remember the last holiday I spent with my father but it's been well over 10 years. My mom comes to my grandparents so that's where we spend majority of our holidays every year. I can't really say that I have an immediate family, traditions or typical intimate dinners and that will never be my story until I create a family of my own. It use to bother me that I couldn't say oh I'm going to my moms or dads for the holidays but I realized that it wasn't so different than others and all that mattered was that I was with family that loved me. 

A lot of people spend a good deal of their life letting dysfunction hinder them, they choose not even participate in gatherings or functions. I was well on my way to wanting to be that person, the person who moves far away, lives a quiet life without interruption. I've realized that's unhealthy, that's lonely and even when I do decide to move further within the next year or so I don't want to be so far away that I can't be reached. By nature I'm a loner, I enjoy being by myself for hours on end and I'm quite good at entertaining myself. Never been a clingy, needy person in my friendships or relationships and unfortunately that throws people off when you don't feel the need to constantly be surrounded. 

Many days you'll find me in my bedroom on the floor, or on my bed with a book or earphones. I like quiet, I like calm and I'm not in a hurry to change it. Daily I pray that God will teach me how to embrace holidays, gatherings because I'm not extremely fond of them. I love my family, spending time with them but outside of them I find it hard to be social. Not a fan of weddings, baby showers or parties but I think that's just my antisocial nature. It's awesome to be excited about the holidays! Don't turn down your excitement for others just try to remember to pray for those who struggle, those who may not have what you have. I've been blessed to have been born into such a big external family and I realize that many don't  even have that. Can we pray for them?

"Heavenly Father, we come to you thankful for all that you have given us. We thank you for our family units, for love, relationships and friendships. God we know that there are many who are not as fortunate, many have lost loved ones, some are going through big life changes like divorce, blending families or coping with struggle of realizing that some aren't coming back. God we ask that you'd fill the void, comfort those who are hurting and let them know that you're always there. Lord we come against suicidial thoughts that people have around this time of year due to the fact that life gets so hard and they just can't deal. Take those thoughts God and replace them with what you tell us in Jeremiah 29:11, let them know that you have a plan to prosper them! Lord we are so grateful for your undying love for us. In Jesus name we pray amen."