I have wrestled with this new phase of life and how to "blog" about it. There is so much to talk about, there is so much that I have learned in the six year span of this blog and I struggled with how I wanted to approach this season of life in general. I started this blog as a 25 year old over zealous, Christian who was wrapped up in a purity cult. My life and world has changed/evolved so much in the past few years so the past six years total cannot be contained within one or even two post. I have had so many moments of joy, pain, grief and clarity within the past few years of my life. I have lost friends and gained new ones within the blink of an eye! I have sat quietly in spaces I never wanted to be in and laughed loudly in places I've only dreamed of. I'll start with my views of spirituality, sexual freedoms etc.
I no longer view the world from a "conservative christian" view like I did back in 2014 when I was wrapped up in a world of pearls, holier than thou cliches and mean girl views. I did not view other women as equals, I did not have a very empathetic view of the world or people who did not think or view the world the way that I did. I was very closed minded, homophobic and self righteous until I hit rock bottom and those VERY people embraced me! When my world of pearls, scriptures and well versed "saints" CRASHED it was the very people whom I had turned my nose up that gathered me, supported me and basically schooled me. I found myself questioning EVERYTHING about my life in general. I found myself questioning my spirituality, my views of the world as a whole and just my very being. So much of me was wrapped up in "ministry" and church that I didn't even honestly know MYSELF! It started with the typical breakdown and shaving my head (I don't know if this is how everyone arrives at the door of enlightenment but it's quite common). My moment of clarity started with depression (go figure) then slowly turned into anger which was interrupted by grief and bitterness so that was a two year stretch. In of all my searching for self, peace and spirituality I remained in church/ministry, I stayed consistent to what I knew because it was simply all that I had known.
My next journey/series is titled "Carefree" and I want to share your stories of joy, hope and even pain because in order to become carefree we often have to face some struggle! I want to share your words even if you prefer to remain anonymous you can send me your stories: whiteboots101@gmail.com 💕💕💕
Comments
Post a Comment