Cults And Promises
cult
kəlt/
noun
- a system of religious veneration and devotion directed toward a particular figure or object.
- a relatively small group of people having religious beliefs or practices regarded by others as strange or sinister."a network of Satan-worshiping cults"
- synonyms:
- sect, denomination, group, movement, church, persuasion, body, faction"a religious cult"
- a misplaced or excessive admiration for a particular person or thing."a cult of personality surrounding the leaders"
- synonyms:
- obsession with, fixation on, mania for, passion for, idolization of, devotion to, worship of, veneration of
The risk I'm taking
writing this... who am I kidding? I have nothing left to lose! If you follow me
you know where I'm about to go or maybe you're new to my blog. I am Ciara
Danelle, friend to many, a sister, a confidant and a keeper of secrets. My
entire life I'd like to say I've been a pretty likable girl/woman and most have
looked at me as a trustworthy person. This isn't one of those name dropping,
drag people for filth type of post though so if that is what you came for then
bye 💓
because that's NOT what the lord gave me.
I have seen ministry
and done ministry from a few different angles and places. Now I don't consider
ministry to always be on a stage or in a pulpit and I feel that ministry is an
everyday life thing. As Christians we need to realize that our every day
actions are ministry and scripture even tells us in Matthew 5:14
"You are the light of the world like a city on a hilltop that cannot be
hidden."
When I got serious
about Christ (I grew up in church) I was about 24 and just really wanted to do
outreach. I did not have many friends and the whole relationship with Jesus was
new to me. I was newly celibate and just really struggling in my walk overall.
I became a part of a purity ministry which had accountability groups in various
cities and that is how I began to make friends. It was my sister, best friend
and some other girls in our community and we would meet monthly for bible study,
outings and prayer. Very innocent meetings, very sincere and we were all new in
our walks.
I am going to pause
right here because what I'm NOT about to do is tear down any ministry or any
particular group of people.
We would meet, we had
specific topics for the month and the main focus was purity. We were all trying
to stay afloat so to speak and even after moving to a new city it was a big
part of my life. It actually became a bigger part of my life when moving to a
bigger city because I did not know a lot of people. The girls/women I met
through the ministry became my family away from home. We were very close at one
point, some of us inseparable at times. My sister, best friend, cousins and I went
to the annual conference a couple times and those years were just really good
times. I went through a season of job loss, trials and my circle was there for
me. Many were really supportive of my book and I will forever be grateful for
the people that surrounded me during the dark days. 2015 was a really hard year
financially, prior to that I had never lost a job or been let go from one and
it seemed like it became a consistent theme in my life. Keeping faith and
trusting God was being drilled into me at that time mainly by my leaders. One
of the best things that I learned in that season was how to seek God for
myself, I have learned how to study the word for myself and it was just a
major growing point for me.
At 28 I had been
celibate for four years, working odd jobs here and there while balancing
college. My circle felt secure, it felt like life was going to be that way
forever. I felt like I could grow in the ministry and had made plans to even
move to Atlanta. Time started winding up as far as the deadlines I had set and
the lord started really dealing with me on moving. Basically he let me know
that wasn't where he wanted me... I couldn't understand it then but the events
over the past year have made me realize why. Now if you've read this far then
you're still waiting for me to tell you when I left that ministry and why I
left. 2016 started off really well, I had a steady job again and was a lot
stronger emotionally than I had ever been. There are hills and valleys... God
gave me a good season of hill/mountain experiences. Then the valleys came again
and it seemed like I had no one to personally turn to. My fierce less leader
had become caught up in her own world, ministry had grown to where she was
unreachable, no longer able to respond to inbox messages and in the group I was
a part of in my city I was the leader so I was lonely. I had two sisters
as roommates but never wanted to burden them with my issues so I spent many
nights crying myself to sleep. I was battling with my emotions, my faith and
just my belief in God. I stopped going to church for awhile, stopped my daily
quiet time and finally made the decision to step back from leading monthly
bible study. I started to notice other girls/women pull away and where as I was
quiet they were not. Social media is our generations way of communicating and
if you want to know anything in this day and age you log on to one of the
outlets, right? From blogs, to Twitter rants I was noticing that many were
experiencing a lot of what I was experiencing from being taught a performance
based Christianity. Mind you that most of us were really young women when we
joined this ministry and many of us went from one extreme of living
undisciplined lives to basically going through a rigorous boot camp where we
were taught how to think, how to pray, how to dress and even taught cliche
phrases and sayings. I will not put the label of cult on it but certain things
and actions became cult-like. Whenever you have a group of impressionable,
lost, broken and lonely individuals who are looking for something to cling to
be it God, family, friendship or just a safe haven you run the risk of becoming
a cult. It is so important that leaders learn what that line is and do not
cross it! When you start to interfere with personal lives, place opinions that
aren't biblical, put personal convictions upon others and make it seem
mandatory you're on the edge.
The breaking point for
me was over politics and we can all agree that this past election was more
intense than anything most of us have ever experienced during an election. Now
when you have a position as a leader (especially a Christian leader) it is so
important that you either keep your political views private or make sure that
you are having open dialogue with those who follow you. As a leader you cannot
make bias statements and not expect for people to disagree with you. And as a
leader yes you're obligated to have conversations and open dialogue when
expressing your opinion or you are better off keeping your opinion to yourself.
When you lead a congregation, have a large following or a following period you
will have moments where people have questions. If you get so busy that you
forget why you were placed in ministry (which is to SERVE) then it's time to
take a hiatus. Even as one human I realize when I have too much on my plate and
need to be alone with the lord. There are some days that my plans take a
backseat, I turn on a worship play list or a sermon play list with my bible and
sit for hours with God.
There are days where
people call me, inbox me or text me and I do not feel like listening or hearing
about their issues but I think about the days that I had NOBODY so I put my
feelings aside. Ministry is NOT about you or your feelings all the time... if
we are given a charge to help broken and hurting people we need to realize there will be those who can't afford our
t-shirts with cliche sayings or buy the expensive books you write. You cannot
tell me that God is pleased when people start releasing 8 or 9 books all while
profiting off of people's pain. Nothing wrong with writing books to help people
but there is a problem when you neglect your audience that God gave you... not
trying to preach. I just had to share what God put on my heart because my
ministry is about transparency, I write books and do blog post like this
because they're what God gives me. The past year of my life I have had to re
program my mind, find God for myself and basically learn that much of what I
was taught was based off of opinions. I harbor no ill type of feelings just
sadness because so many years were spent just wanting to be better, wanting to
make friends which I did but also lost some because they're still loyal to that
ministry. That ministry isolates and basically writes off those who walk away
from it which is also a cult like action. You cannot BLOCK and write people off
when they respectfully disagree, those are souls and that is on your hands. My
biggest prayer is that this trend of clique culture, t-shirt, purity rings
passes soon and we get back to the heart of what he gave us to do.
God gives us
these ministries to reach the broken, yes I am a writer so I understand NEEDING
to make a profit because this is what I do for a living. I also understand that
when I'm walking in my calling he will send people into my life who help me,
the books will sale because money is necessary. My biggest pet peeve would be
those who misquote 1 Timothy 6:10 which states that the LOVE of money is the
root of all evil. Ecclesiastes 10:19 tells us that money is the answer for
everything so yes in the kingdom, within the Christian community we have a need
to make a living just like the world but the issue is within our motive. Why
are you writing books and selling merchandise with scripture? Is it to be a
light? Is it to draw others to Christ? The motive behind these relationship/
purity based ministries is EVERYTHING! We have become a purity culture that is
so far from the heart of God. Can we get back to conferences, opening our homes
to the broken and pouring out our hearts? Can we go back to the humbleness of
sitting in a room with 5-10 girls/women and sharing our hurts, our victories
and not worry about our vulnerability being played on or profited? We can't get
the past back... we can change the culture though and where we are heading. The
last thing I want to leave you with is a charge to examine your own heart, not
the ministries, people or things I have written about but your own heart.
Ask God what is it that he has called you to do and ask him to show you how to
get back to the heart of serving.- Cdj❤
Wow!
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