Becoming A Lady

I don't think the way I use to think and I no longer act the way I once acted. My interest and preference in the men I find attractive has really changed. I prayed to become this woman, I fought, cried and crawled to mentally grow into this woman. I have so much further to go and maybe even some more fighting because I'm not where I want to be yet. I wouldn't mind a relationship but I'm not in hot pursuit of one. While the rest of my friends pop out babies or walk down aisles I am evolving into this woman who encourages, motivates and seeks God with her whole heart. A part of me is afraid of losing this woman once I start a family. A part of me loves this phase of life because I'm learning so much about who I am in Christ. And a part of me is so busy just chasing dreams, trusting God and sitting before him that marriage only crosses my mind every once and awhile. Some days I get baby fever but that quickly passes when I realize that I can sleep as much and as long as I want. I don't feel bad about being single anymore because it's a beautiful thing to get to know God and yourself without interruption. These are just my random thoughts today.